I was out getting some Panda Express when I decided to walk into Blockbuster Video and ended up with a movie I had heard nothing about, "10,000 B.C.". Going in, I noticed the store had recovered a little since the last time I was there. Rental stores like Blockbuster are taking an economic hit thanks to the new marketing dominance of internet video, YouTube, and companies like NetFlix.

For those of you who haven't heard of NetFlix, welcome to the new generation of entertainment. NetFlix delivers movies directly to your house, will never charge you late fees, and you can get a virtually unlimited number of rentals at no extra cost. Most of the movies you can watch directly off their website without having to wait for the DVD. The internet not only brought with it little petty convinces like managing all your banking needs at home, email, online music stores, etc. but it also brought a new way of looking at the way businesses treat their customers.

When this "web 2.0" (read web two-point-oh) craze hit (I consider NetFlix to be a part of this) it sparked a new form of honesty. Around this time small businesses were becoming more and more dominant, and one of the biggest strengths of small business is that they can focus their attention on an individual customer's needs.

How many times have you gone into Blockbuster to find you have an old late fee?



A small business owner would be more inclined to say, "Well, OK Mark, I'll wipe the fee this time but don't let it happen next time." where a larger business would give you a cold face and point to the customer policy sign that's framed on the wall next to a portrait of George Bush. It's the kind of frustrating business practices that make customers angry. Nevertheless, either one of these scenarios creates an unfavorable situation that ultimately turns people off.

The Web 2.0 way of thinking means that instead of keeping hold that old business model, companies should begin focusing on finding a new model that benefits the customer - the idea being that keeping things practical and "real" ultimately means keeping the customers. For example, people don't like late fees, so lets find a new way to do our business that eliminates late fees. That's what NetFlix did.

The old type of mentality is what's keeping old businesses back. Its the mentality that you see on those loud TV commercials and infomercials.



It's that advertising formula that we've heard so many times that it's lost all meaning whatsoever. It's transparent, powerless, and really annoying. It's like the late fees that you just want to get away from.

10,000 B.C. is that formula

So I got home and began watching 10,000 B.C. It started out pretty cool... but that feeling started going away after about 10 minutes. These prehistoric humans have... shaved faces... perfect teeth... speak English... but they have all the cliche superficial things that make them look primal. Neclaces of bones. "Dirty" faces. The old wise people holding staffs with dangley skulls. You know... so that way you know they're wise. And apparently girls wear concealer in 10,000, too.



But most importantly, it had an orchestral soundtrack that featured "primal" drums and a solo bamboo flute. This flute is the worst cliche ever. I hate that spiritual flute. Don't get me wrong, I love the instrument it has a beautiful sound. But film composers use it with no remorse as if there was no other way to convey the same spiritual idea.

It was in The Last Temptation of Christ, Brotherhood of the Wolf, Last Samuri, to name a few. Any time Chikotay (the Indian from Star Trek Voyager) starts talking about something spiritual there's that damn flute. It's the mother of all film music cliches. If anybody ever asks me for the "wise primal flute" I'm going to kill them. There are better, more sophisticated ways to make a point than hitting somebody over the head with it. You might as well put up a huge sign that says "THIS SITUATION IS SPIRITUAL AND PRIMITIVE-ISH. BELIEVE IT!".

Conclusion

10,000 BC is what we "Web 2.0" customers have come to hate. It represents the idea that we viewers are nothing more than mindless consumers that will ingest the same regurgitated crap. Making movies like this is like telling the viewers that they're not special, they're stupid, will believe anything that they're told, and will be happy to pay late fees.

The tomato meter gives it 9 out of 100 - a single digit rating. That website rottentomatoes.com is a good example of the internet keeping things real. Back before the internet you would get one of those reviews from a bought-out reviewer:




Rotten Tomatoes takes reviews from everywhere and puts them into one rating, the "tomato meter". And you can get tomato meter ratings from professional reviewers and regular Joes. You're not limited to one-sided and slanted perspectives, just keeping it real.

In conclusion, 10,000 B.C. reaks with the hollywood forumla. Nothing is original, it's a bunch of recycled gimmicks (some used more than once) that you've seen in other movies. Seriously, take a look at this cover art. Look familiar?



So the point of all this, my fellow film-maker readers, is to embrace within your films the most important aspect of a new generation: give 'em something unexpected, and always keep it real.

Now, you definitely have to check out this satire of video renting by the Onion. I love the Onion. They take the formulas and turn them against themselves for some brilliant comedy.

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At the Cannes Film Festival, director Quentin Tarantino (Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill, Reservoir Dogs) revealed at a Cinema Master Class why he uses previously recorded music rather than original scores for his movies:



"What if I don't like it?", I'll answer that. The whole idea is that you know what the composer is going to write before it hits the recording session and makes its way into your film. "I just don't trust any composer to do it" is just a sign that he doesn't know how to work with a composer. If you are a composer, you should expect to earn the trust and respect of your director. If you're the director, don't expect to put your music track in the hands of fate. You'd expect to go through a shot list and storyboards with your cinematographer before shooting, right? Film music is no different. Here are the steps any decent director/composer should go through to make sure to get the right score.

1. Get a Good Composer That Works for You

Find some eager and available film composers and listen to their music. Realize that most composers are capable of more than one style or technique. Most decent composers these days have the tools to give you what you want. If you want to work through an agency, tell them what kind of music you are looking for and have them give you suggestions on their available talent.

You'll frequently see that a director finds a composer he likes and sticks with him. This is because each knows what the other wants and they understand each other's capabilities. Darren Aronofsky & Clint Mansell, Stephen Spielberg & John Williams, and Tim Burton & Danny Elfman come to mind. Tim Burton has said of Danny Elfman:

2. Discuss the Music You Want

Once you've found a composer, discuss with him the moods and feelings you want for your film (before you even begin shooting if possible). Tell us about different films that you like and films that have music similar to what you're looking for. Give your composer examples; "I like the quirky style of Six Feet Under", "Erie yet triumphant like the back-scoring in Star Wars".

Don't be intimidated if you aren't familiar with the music jargon. It doesn't have to be academically specific. Just tell your composer what you want, in your own words. We don't expect you to say things like "I enjoy the German doubly augmented 6ths chords that resolve in parallels to chromatic minor mediants with added major sevenths in the Kazoozaphone." In fact, many composers hope to avoid this. A good composer should have the skill and experience to interpret what you mean - after all, its our job.

The sooner you can get the ideas churning in into your composer's head the better. It gives us time to saturate ourselves with the type of music you want. Don't be afraid to ask your composer to write some little temp stuff, a melody, some progressions, etc. It makes the composer feel less anxious to know he's on the right path.

After you're finished shooting, suggest that your composer come in and see some of the raw footage and rough cuts that you have put together. Nothing can spark the mind of a film composer better than seeing the cinematography, editing, and acting styles as they begin to come together.

3. Spot the Film

After the cut is finished, before any effects shots, color correction and final sound mix, sit down with your composer and "spot" the film. Sometimes called a "spotting session", this is where the director and composer watch the locked cut and share ideas about the impressions and moods of specific scenes. At this point, the director might reference music that the composer has written, or specific works that give the desired mood. Usually a composer will be accompanied by his music editor, who will write down the specific timings and points of interest.

4. Get Mock-Ups

Welcome to the 21st century. Thanks to modern technology, a composer can create a "mock-up" of the score using digital instrument samples before it gets recorded and mastered by real live people. Mock-ups can be easily changed to get closer to what you want. Instrument samples are so good these days that many times the director will be happy to use the mock-up itself!

5. You Can Always Get A Different Composer

That's just the reality of the industry and we understand that. Many of the top-level composers have been replaced at the last second because they couldn't get the music right. Sometimes it just works out that way. But if you took the appropriate steps beforehand, you and your composer will have nothing to worry about. Your film is an important investment so make sure to invest in your score, too.


That's your composer. I'm surprised you haven't met him yet. And showing him your movie at the end is a bad idea.

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I have seen the future of music notation and let me tell you, it doesn't look pretty. In fact, it's not much different from the way music looks now - the only difference is that it looks like it was drawn by a little kid.

The stems are on the wrong side, the noteheads are smashed together, the sharp signs are way too small, the clef is sagging too low and looks like its taking a nap, the letter names on the pitches are wrong... I hate to pick on Star Trek (after all I'm a huge fan), but this screenshot shows something that has been bothering me about movies and TV ever since I started learning music.

If you're a musician, you may have noticed a TV or movie with one or more of the following:

1. a piano player is moving down the keys yet the sounds are going up.
2. A trumpet player who can play a scale with 3 or fewer fingerings.
3. An orchestra which can start with no preps from the conductor.
4. Full out operatic singing with a half open mouth.
5. Trombones being held by the brace.
6. Oh, and you'll never see a tuba, only Sousaphones.

When it comes to TV and video production, this just goes to show how low music is on the ladder. Attending to these tasks responsibly is supposed to be the job of the Music Supervisor. Though in my experience Music Supervisors don't have much music experience other than listening to music and working contracts.

If you're a filmmaker, there are two possible solutions. You could get people who have musical experience or train your novice actors to do it right. Actors will spend months doing martial arts training for a role, it wouldn't hurt too much to spend a week on some music lessons.

The other option is to get real musicians to do the work. Put your casting agency to work or grab some kids from your local college. I have a trombone-playing friend who also does work as an extra. He gets paid just because he knows how to hold the trombone - correctly! And we all know that musicians need the money.

Once you get into post production, you can always get the council of your friendly composer. If you hired a good one, I'm sure he would be eager and knowledgeable enough to keep your production from looking like a cartoon to the eyes of musicians.

Now to the defense of Star Trek, they did do a good job with the rest of the scene.

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I finally graduated from college and I'm eager to get on with real life™. I have several new projects coming down the pipes and more time to finally get working on these things that actually matter.

For example, the contact form on this site is finally working correctly if you feel inclined to send me a message. I'll also get your emails right away with a new email-capable phone!

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